Little Black Dress – An Epitaph*


“Here rests my LBD upon the back of the closet
In youth it served me well, to fortune and to renown
Fashion frown’d not on its simple classic lines,
And stylists mark’d it for their own.

Elegant was its cut, and its silhouette full of grace,
Heav’n did a recompense, my XL size it toiled to mend
It gave to me all it had, a trim waist and shapely base,
It became for me (’twas all I wish’d) a dear and trusted friend.

No longer do I seek its merits now to use,
Or draw upon its figure-shaping tricks, however clever,
Failing the weight and the bulge to lose
With a sigh and a tear I lay my LBD to rest, forever!”


* With sincere apologies to Thomas Gray (1716-1771).

For those of you classically inclined, here’s the original: An Epitaph – By Thomas Gray